Dave Warner (Sydney Thunder)
Sunil Narine (West Indies)
Jeevan Mendis (Sri Lanka)
Daniel Smith (Sydney Thunder)
Luke Feldman (Hobart Hurricanes)
Kurtis Patterson (NSW)
Josh Lalor (NSW)
Pat Cummins (Perth Scorchers)
Shane Watson (Brisbane Heat)
Nathan McCullum (New Zealand)
Dwayne Bravo (West Indies)
Stuart MacGill (retired)
Steve O’Keeffe – opened in the recent CLT20 and won man of the match for his efforts. One of a plethora of all rounders available to the sixers and with international experience to boot.
Steve Smith – batsmen/spnner who has pretty much given up bowling. SS is a gold plated member of the shit list – e thlong and not so illustrious list of ‘spinners’ tried since SK Warne’s retirement. Smith doesn’t seem to bend his knees at all when batting, has unusual ovine facial features, runs with straight arms by his side, doesn’t bend the peak of his cap. Why you ask? One can only speculate that it’s some sort of style or fashion statement that Smith thinks will make him more “fiddy” and give him more street cred. Steven – you’re a white guy wearing magenta playing cricket – bend the peak dickhead you’re not a gangster rapper. Great fielder though, he won the brown glove last year for most catches by an outfielder.
Mosies Henriques – moustache wearing all rounder who many say is proof that you are given a yellow and green baseball cap n a brown paper bag when you get your Speed Blitz Blues baseball cap. Moises is from Portugal hence his nickname “Espanyol”. “Espanyol” has an abnormal fear of the number 3085 – some say it’s because he fears his first class runs will stop at 3085, some say he fears that it will be 3085 days between international call ups for him, some say it is because his biggest critic resides in the postcode 3085. Personally he reminds me of Brendon Julian for some reason.
Josh Lalor – pace bowler who has been making semi regular to regular appearances for the Blues n the Ryobi cup. JL has been badgering Brett Lee to let him take over Richard Chee Que’s role in Lee’s band “Six and Out” after Kerry O’Keeffe told him that Chee Quee had quit to take up a solo career in Korea and was having moderate success with a song called “Gangnam Style”
Brett Lee – Channel 9 cricket commentator who will take time out of his hectic commentary schedule, Cricket Show hosting and general shoulder to cry on for injured fast bowlers role to bowl international standard heavy balls for the Sixers. Binga has been maintaining his fitness by bowling at every AFL and NRL player in the country on the Cricket Show and by joining the Channel 9 Commentary team on 6am runs with former Australian team fitness coach Jock Campbell.
Brad Haddin – former Test Keeper who is skippering the good ship Sixer this season. Piloted the squad to the CLT20 trophy in October and will be a force to be reckoned with at the top of the order as this format allows him to ‘play his natural game’
Daniel Smith – mudguts is back. Fat as a house keeper who turned his back on the Thunder where he was a playing assistant coach. DS won’t get the gloves off Haddin but may well get a game as a batsmen only at some stage during the tournament. ‘Smiffy’ brings a lot of lollies, cakes, beef jerk y and chewing tobacco to the dressingroom.
Dom Thornely – 34 year old former NSW all rounder who back n his day was a batsmen who bowled some handy mediums. His day was at least 3 years ago before he retired from the first class scene. But a few years back during the state based Bash NSW had an inury crisis and called ‘Thorns’ out of retirement to plug a gap and he has been hanging around the SCG based Big Bash teams ever since. In a Mark Waugh style move his mediums have become gentle off spin and in an un-Mark Waugh like move his batting spot has dropped down to 7 or 8. With so many allrounders in the Sixers line up ‘Thorns’ services often seem to be surplus to requirement – the main trait DT seems to bring to the team is being a good bloke.
Nic Maddison – up and coming batsmen who is a regular top 3 bat for NSW. Big things are predictd for this kid but I’m not sure if this would be his favoured forma at the present time.
Ian Moran – 33 year old all rounder of the Sydney grade cricket variety. I would think he and Dom Thornely are duelling for the same spot: veteran all rounder. Brother by a different mother to Jason and Mark.
Josh Hazlewood – got injured being 12th man for Australia durng the 3rd test in Perth. Tom Beaton was right – being Twelthy is no easy task, you can even get injured doing it! Anyway it seems Hazlewood has a spot in his foot that could get hot any time between now and next summer’s Boxing Day Test so the physios have ordered hm to stop running and keep his walking to a minimum. To this end he has been issued a Cricket Australia segway and is taking lessons from Joe the Camerman.
Mitchell Starc – left arm paceman. Likely to be heavily involved in Test and ODI duties for his country. Is swinging arms/tracking square with Ian Healy’s neice Alyce Healy of the Southern Stars (Australian Womens Cricket Team for the mysoginists out there) I wonder what they talk about? Rugby League?
Kurtis Patterson – batsmen. Last season he became the youngest ever player to make a first calss century for NSW when he tonned up on debut if you don’t mind. May get a look in batting at No 6 when the nternationals clear off but he hasn’t been sighted much for NSW this season.
Dave Warner – opening batsmen. Warner Bros Jumped ship from the Thunder in the off season in a bit of a curious move given he has a personal sponsorship arrangement with Stadium Australia. Destructive billegerent opener who won’t play very much due to Test and ODI commitments.
Sunil Narine – off spinner. West Indies mystery spinner who had the Aussies confused during the one day segment of the recent Windies tour. It seems all it takes now to get a Big Bash contract is to play well in one game against Australia. Michael Lumb I am looking at you.
Luke Feldman – right arm runs. Queensland pace bowler who is a police man in his time away from cricket. Has been ostracised n several dressingrooms due to fear he will uncover match fixing or dalliances with bookies. Some say he is a plant by Cricket Australia to weed out the culture of recreation drug taking that they believe is rife n some state cricket sides. I’m only surprised CA didn’t abseil him into the Scorchers squad??
Michael Lumb – Saffer born Englishman (Gee that is a familiar ‘nationality’ in international cricket!) Won the World T20 with England in 2010 and will suit up for his 3rd Big Bash – his second with the Sixers. He was also a key plank of the duckboard that was the Sixers CLT20 victory in October.
The sqaud contans plenty of fringe internationals or past internationals in the two Steve’s Messers Smith and O’Keeffe, Moises Henriques, Brad Haddn and Brett Lee who should all be available for the duration of the tournament. However they won’t see a lot of the Aussie reps in Warner & Starc. The inclusion of Sunil ‘Mystery Spinner’ Narine is a coup too. In a word: strong
- Brad Haddin
- Michael Lumb
- Steve Smith
- Nic Maddison
- Moises Henriques
- Daniel Smith
- Steve O’Keeffe
- Ian Moran
- Brett Lee
- Sunil Narine
- Josh Lalor
THE PREDICTION: 2nd